Michele L Montgomery

Friendship is defined a personal relationship shared between each friend for the welfare of one another, in other words, it is the relationship of trust, faith and concern for each others feelings. It is a relationship of mutual caring and intimacy among one another."

So, knowing just the smallest definition of what that one word means, in laymen terms, what does it mean to you? Really think about it and then take a look around you. Look at the people you work with, at your neighbors, at school buddies, and even the people you talk to on-line.

Out of all those people you come into contact with on a daily basis, who among them fits the above definition? Lets go beyond that and then ask: Who, of my "friends" do I really trust? Do I really trust that person or persons? Dare I share myself?

"Friendship is all about how much you care and understand each other. It is a pure relationship, which would make your friend smile, feel good as to how much you love him and care for him. It is all about talking, listening and building up a strong relationship loyalty among each other."

Recently someone here on Goodreads had a terrible experience with a friend. They met this past May, they chatted and developed a bond, a friendship. They may have shared fascinating personal facts about themselves that no one else knows, or they may have kept it on a light non-personal level but whichever way they chose to take it, something went wrong. Really wrong.

"There are some friendships which might end with unresolved conflicts and tiffs which means that these type of relationship were not so strong that could hold on their own in adversity and bad times. Friendship is not about merry-making and fun it involves equal loyalty from both the partners." (thank you ezine articles)

ONE of those partners obviously didn't take the time to understand friendship. It involves equal loyalty from both...One of those partners took a pretty bad turn and that bond was broken, very broken and it's one I don't think will ever be repaired. IN fact, I know it won't be. The other person turned that friendship ugly by becoming a stalker and that person harassed the prior friend, or how would you call this? Harassed the ex-friend sounds better and sent that person HATE emails, from several different email accounts as the injured party was instructed to block all incoming mail from the ex-friend. Finally it got to the point that, lets call the injured friend Fred...Fred had to delete his email account all together because he had no way of knowing which new email address would be invented by the other person to send him emails. These were not nice emails, they were full of hurtful statements that had no business reaching his eyes...He has a sweet soul and deserved better.

Now, lets go one step further...Fred's ex-friend then began sending emails to Fred's Goodreads Friends! In the email, the same one copied over, ex-friend made some pretty bold statements and asked the friends to turn their backs on Fred. Lies were made up and then this hot mess was carried to a few Yahoo Groups and the note was spread there as well. Do you know the damage done to Fred over this? Physically no, ex-friend can't get to Fred, luckily he never shared his real physical address with said ex-friend but still. The emotional damage this person caused over a matter of a week? It was horrendous to watch.

I silently cried for Fred and no...I don't really know him, and I may never meet him face to face, but I know enough about him that he didn't deserve that betrayal by a person calling them-self his best friend. Slowly, I will work on becoming a true friend to Fred because he is someone I want to know better. And if we are meant to be friends, good for us.

"It should be understood that not all friends are best friends. One might come across numerous number of friends in his life but there are very few who will be their during your ups and down."

"... a best friend from among your friends is the hardest task to do..."

In life, I think I've had a handful of "best friends." How many have you had or do have? I have a few and I consider myself so very lucky to have them...(and yes you know who you are.)

"A true friendship does not consist of a huge number of friends you keep but it is valued by its worth and capability to hold you and stand by you in all phases of life."

So, in short...When you do come across someone you feel would fit that bill...don't be afraid to take that step to form that bond, that friendship...just be cautious and you'll know when that time is right to take it up a level. A true friend will never try to take your life over or away...

And always remember: A friend is someone who bails you out of jail. A true friend is in jail with you.